We all come to photography from different angles, but for Melissa Barnes, loss and love cemented her affection for the medium. But photography isn’t her only love. Melissa is also a full-time architectural designer and doesn’t plan on giving up either career anytime soon.
In this tender episode, Melissa shares her family history, how it’s shaped her love of photography, why she has no plans to become a full-time photographer, and how her cultural heritage shapes her art and work. She also shares how she captures those tender, romantic moments for her clients and why these connections give her so much joy.
Let’s dive in!
What’s in this episode:
- [02:05] The family tragedies that propelled Melissa into her love of photography
- [04:56] Why Melissa isn’t—and doesn’t want to be—a full-time photographer
- [06:14] How Melissa captures love and romance in ordinary places
- [09:46] How Melissa’s cultural heritage influences her photography work
- [13:00] Where many styled shoots fall flat and how Melissa thinks they could be more equitable
- [15:38] How being a multi-passionate person has affected Melissa and her work
- [19:34] Melissa’s lightning round
If you’re ready to give deep into capturing those romantic moments on camera, this episode with Melissa is one you can’t miss!
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Meet Melissa Barnes
Melissa Barnes is a Florida based photographer, known for her romantic storytelling rich sessions with couples, maternity clients and more. Melissa is also a full-time architectural designer and project manager, and she brings the same thoughtful artistry into her photography, often blending in florals, painted details, and a love for turning ordinary places into extraordinary backdrops. Proudly half Filipino and fluent Tagalog, Melissa’s cultural roots and creative energy infuse everything she does. She’s a Canon girl, a cancer, and an I-N-F-J, and Type 2 enneagram, and she’ll be the first to tell you she’s a homebody who has learned to thrive behind the lens.
Connect with Melissa
Did this episode with Melissa Barnes give you a new perspective on your photography “why”? Check out this episode Follow your Heart: How to thrive as a Multi-passionate Creative Entrepreneur with Photographer Lucy Baber that shares how another photographer started their career!
Transcript
[00:00:00] Melissa: I think having different creative outlets and perspectives keeps things fresh and gives me more to pull from my background in architecture. For example, things like floral design, storytelling, how I approach a session. I’d be lying if I said it was always easy, but like I’ve said, sometimes it feels like the creative world wants you to pick a land and stay in it, and there was definitely times I wondered if I was less serious because I didn’t do it full time.
[00:00:24] But over time I realized all these passions feed each other and they make my work richer, more layered, more uniquely mine. So now I see it as a strength because nobody else in the world is gonna be exactly like you, and that’s your superpower.
[00:00:40] Lisa: Hey, friend. Welcome to the Art and Soul Show. I’m your host, Lisa DiGeso, a mom, a photographer and entrepreneur. Tune in here for Pep Talks, conversations and advice on photography, creativity, mindset, business, life, and that messy in between. This is the place where you can go when you need a boost of encouragement, a kick in the [00:01:00] pants, and inspiration to pick up your camera.
[00:01:02] This is the Art and Soul show. Hello, my beautiful friends. Welcome back the show. Today I’m hanging out with the talented Melissa Barnes, a Florida based photographer, known for her romantic storytelling rich sessions with couples, maternity clients and more. Melissa is also a full-time architectural designer and project manager, and she brings the same thoughtful artistry into her photography, often blending in florals.
[00:01:29] Painted details and a love for turning ordinary places into extraordinary backdrops. Proudly half Filipino and fluent Tagalog. Melissa’s cultural roots and creative energy infuse everything she does. She’s a Canon girl, a cancer, and an I-N-F-J-A type. Two anagram and she’ll be the first to tell you she’s a homebody who has learned to thrive behind the lens.
[00:01:51] Her four series Love in Ordinary Places is so beautiful. It’s an example of finding magic in the everyday. And I am so excited to dive [00:02:00] into this conversation. So welcome Melissa.
[00:02:05] So I’m excited to talk about your story. So how did you first sort of fall in love with photography?
[00:02:11] Melissa: Yeah. Thank you so much. So I actually first fell in love with photography in high school. I took a class where we built those pinhole cameras from a coffee can. Oh. And um, that kind of piqued my interest.
[00:02:24] Yeah. And then after getting the hang of that for a little bit, I saved up some birthday money to buy myself a little Kodak digital camera, you know, as a little upgrade from that coffee camera. Eventually, like my mom got me my first cannon Rebel surprise, and that’s when it really took off. And not to get too deep right away, but I had like a pretty difficult childhood and a lot of people.
[00:02:48] And among other things I went through, I had cancer in high school and by the time I turned 30 I had lost both my parents. Yeah. Oh my gosh, girl. My dad, when I was 18. [00:03:00] My mom about five years ago, just days after I got engaged to my husband. Yeah, it’s a lot. It’s a lot. Wow. It’s a lot all at once in the, at a young age, but I feel like that’s really where my purpose for photography started.
[00:03:15] Because for a long time, when I was young, I was really insecure about being in photos, especially after losing my hair during chemo. But when my parents passed, all I could think about was how badly I wish I had more photos with them and that stayed with me ever. ’cause it became like a way to hold on to people.
[00:03:32] And so I wanted to try to help people. Preserve the things that I didn’t kind of thing.
[00:03:38] Lisa: Oh, that’s beautiful. I’m so sorry for everything you’ve been through. Like what a strong lady you are. Like, Hmm, girl. Thank you. It’s a lot. It’s a lot. Gosh. It’s a lot. It’s a lot. So when you also have a full-time career in architecture and project management, is that correct?
[00:03:58] Melissa: Oh my gosh. [00:04:00]
[00:04:00] Lisa: So talk about having to be really organized and really great at your time management. So do you have any favorite processes or systems that you love that you can share with us?
[00:04:12] Melissa: A good old Gole calendar, to be honest. Yeah. Yep. I, I’m a very big like list person. Yep. So having my task for the day and like balancing both definitely takes some intention and having boundaries is a must.
[00:04:25] I’ve learned I can’t do everything at once, so I rely on routines, structure to keep things flowing. I treat photography like I would any project at my architecture job, timeline the workflow, making sure communication’s on point, Google calendar religiously to block out time for editing and. Shoot prep.
[00:04:42] And I also try to like batch tasks together, like doing emails on certain days and, but the biggest thing has helped me is learning to say no when I need to. And that’s been key to protecting my energy and staying excited about both careers. A hundred percent. A hundred percent.
[00:04:56] Lisa: Now what I read too is you don’t plan to go full-time with photography.
[00:04:59] And I love [00:05:00] that you said that because that is so refreshing, honestly, because we hear like, I wanna have my six figure business, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. So can you talk about that choice and what it’s meant for you creatively?
[00:05:11] Melissa: I know that’s pretty unusual. Everyone usually asks me like, oh, why not go full time on either?
[00:05:16] And it’s just like, I’ve just felt the pressure from both sides, photography and architecture to choose one path. Like you can’t love and pursue both. And I’ve never really understood that. And I always think no one tells moms they have to choose between being a mom and being a photographer. So why is this any different and.
[00:05:31] People aren’t, you know, these one trick ponies and we’re made of layers of different interests. And for me, I’ve always believed that if something matters enough to you, you’ll find a way to make it work. And keeping photography is something I choose to do and not something I have to do kind of keeps me in this creative head space.
[00:05:47] And it allows me to shoot what I wanna shoot. And that way I track my deal clients. I’m not just shooting something that I’m not as excited about just because I need the session to pay my bills, you know?
[00:05:56] Lisa: I love that so much. I think that’s, that’s such a beautiful way to look at it. And then [00:06:00] it just makes you, then you’re really so excited about the projects you do take on.
[00:06:04] Melissa: Yes, yes. And I, I feel like having both has been able to let me do that so that way I’m not like,
[00:06:11] Lisa: ah,
[00:06:11] Melissa: you know, electric’s due tomorrow. I need to shoot
[00:06:14] Lisa: what I don’t normally shoot. Exactly. Now, tell me about your series Love in Ordinary Places. What inspired that and how do you find that romance at every day?
[00:06:26] Melissa: Love and order places shaped by a few really personal things. Like I said, I had a harder childhood and I carried a lot of trauma early on. So finding the light, even in like the smallest place has really made a big difference for me and helped me survive and being able to find something beautiful and something ugly has shaped.
[00:06:43] The way I started to look at the world and wanted to make that feeling tangible and something other people could connect with. And of course, my husband also inspired a lot of it. My love language is acts of service, so the grand gestures, like the presents never really impressed me. And while he’ll still [00:07:00] give me flowers every now and then, most of the time it’s like the little things, the way he.
[00:07:04] Gets my laundry started or goes to get gas for me so I don’t have to worry about the next day. That’s who he is and that’s how he takes care of me and that’s what I wanted to document. So when I think of romance, I think about my husband. I think about the places like the laundromats or just sitting in the car after a long day.
[00:07:21] Those are the every moments that I feel like aren’t photographed, and I think they should.
[00:07:26] Lisa: I love that. So you’ve done sessions like in the laundromat or like a gas station. Have you done that?
[00:07:32] Melissa: Yes, both. Oh, I love it.
[00:07:35] Lisa: Um, so fun. I think. Have you done, like, you know what’s so funny is like, I swear my love language is like going out for food, and so like, oh yes.
[00:07:42] My husband loves cheeseburgers, like loves cheeseburgers. So I think it would be, so I could just envision this shoot, like sitting in the back of the car, like just going into like getting, getting fast food, like I think that’s so sweet.
[00:07:55] Melissa: I’ve done a fast food one and I’ve done a parking lot [00:08:00] One. I, my husband’s exact same way and he, he was like, exactly the person that I thought about when I did the fast food one.
[00:08:08] I love it. I love it. My husband would be into that shoot. I think that’s so funny. I love it.
[00:08:13] Lisa: And so sometimes you also have florals incorporated in your sessions. So do you style those yourself or do you collaborate with florist?
[00:08:22] Melissa: Absolutely. Posing to me is really just body language. And body language is naturally storytelling.
[00:08:28] So I try to be intentional about what a pose is saying, and I don’t want a couple to look stiff or overly directed, but I also don’t want to leave them completely guessing. So there’s a balance there. And I usually start with like a general prompt, walk towards me and talk about your favorite date kind of thing.
[00:08:42] And then I watch how they naturally fall into each other. And from there I make. The little adjustments to bring out the emotion or just to see for aesthetics purposes what looks better. But even something as small as the placement of a hand or where someone’s eyes are looking can totally shift the message of an image.
[00:08:58] And ultimately, I’m always [00:09:00] thinking about their connection first, and I want the photos to feel like them and not just something pretty for Instagram. And that starts with making sure the way I guide them tells their story that feels real to them.
[00:09:09] Lisa: I love that. I saw the trend, it was a couple years ago where they were doing stranger sessions where they’d have like.
[00:09:16] They do. Done. I’ve done it. Yeah. Have you done it? I was, I was gonna ask. I was like, how did that go?
[00:09:21] Melissa: They really had good chemistry. You would’ve never guessed that they didn’t know each other. But I was so sad to hear that they never connected after they never hooked
[00:09:29] Lisa: up. Oh, wouldn’t that be like the best?
[00:09:31] Dang, dang. Like I’m a romantic at heart, like I love Hallmark. Me too. Like
[00:09:37] Melissa: man, I wanted them to work out so bad because like I would have to be her made of honor. Obviously. Obviously. Obviously
[00:09:46] Lisa: you’ve been really open about your cultural background too, so has your Filipino heritage influenced your art or your creative lens?
[00:09:53] Melissa: Being Filipino has definitely influenced me and it’s shaped how I see the world and that [00:10:00] naturally spills into my work. I feel like our culture is so rooted in the warmth and family and hospitality and emotion, and I think that’s why I’m so drawn to storytelling and connection to my photography. If you know someone that’s Filipino, chances are they’ve cooked for you before there’s this deep appreciation and you know somebody who’s Filipino.
[00:10:17] Yes.
[00:10:18] Lisa: I had clients and, and they actually brought me food.
[00:10:20] Melissa: I knew it. I knew it. See,
[00:10:26] there’s like a deep appreciation for like hospitality in Filipino culture and for people to be cared for. So I try to bring that into every session. Mm-hmm. And whether it’s how I communicate, the way I guide them, I always say I want people to feel like how they do when a Filipino friend brings them, which are the Filipino egg rolls.
[00:10:43] Yeah. I knew it. See, it was awesome. It was a newborn session and I was like, how? Who made these, it was her mother-in-law. Yeah, exactly. Photographer. Yeah. I was like, that’s amazing. I love it. See, you’re, you’re, you’re taking care of, you’re welcomed, you’re fed [00:11:00] without even having to ask. It was beautiful.
[00:11:04] Lisa: So what’s something that’s been creatively lighting you up lately?
[00:11:08] Melissa: Honestly mentoring, and I’ve never really thought I would be the person to like that, just because I’ve felt like I’ve been so burned by mentorships and workshops before, so I’ve had a little bad taste in my mouth about it, but I’ve loved it, whether it’s mentoring other photographers or sharing my process even behind the scenes.
[00:11:26] Mm-hmm. It’s been really fulfilling and I always feel so honored that people trust me enough to wanna learn from me. And I feel like my approach to. Mentoring is kind of the same way I pose. It’s very client led and with gentle guidance for me. I’m not here to mold someone into my style, and I don’t think your best work ever comes from trying to emulate someone else.
[00:11:44] And I’m here to help them uncover their voice. And I always try to be very transparent about that from day one. And a lot of people will approach me thinking, I’ll just teach them entirely how I edit and nip that right in the bud. And I think the photography community constantly goes through this. Yeah, this like [00:12:00] wave of.
[00:12:00] Identity crisis where they feel like their work is not good enough unless it looks like somebody else’s. Yeah. And I’ve been there, so I get it. And that’s why mentorship to me is more about helping people find the little improvements that they’re looking for their own work, but in a way where they can still thrive in their own light and not mine.
[00:12:17] Lisa: That’s a great way to put it. And I, you know, it’s so funny ’cause a lot of the, the material or the workshops that I create or the mentoring I do has come from maybe. Things that I learned I didn’t wanna do, so, or how I didn’t want things to run. And you know, like it’s, it’s interesting ’cause that’s not really something that gets talked about is like, right, having mentorship that don’t work out or like masterminds that don’t work out or, there have been a lot of things that I’ve signed up for that I felt like I was at the wrong prom.
[00:12:44] Like I was just, was not with the right people that understood me or our business or. How I wanted to show up in the world. So I think that’s really interesting that, you know, you’ve taken that right and you’re using that to create your method. I love that. Yeah.
[00:12:59] Melissa: That’s awesome. [00:13:00]
[00:13:00] Lisa: So what’s something about styled shoots that you wish more people considered or discussed?
[00:13:07] Melissa: Oh man. This tends to be a touchy subject for some, but, uh, something I really wish. Uh, something I wish more people really talked about was how often vendors and models don’t get paid for these shoots and. I’ve seen a lot of shoots where the photographer or host is the only one profiting, and to me that just doesn’t feel fair.
[00:13:28] And so many talented people, the florist, hair, makeup artists, models are showing up. They’re putting in real time and that resources product, and often only getting a photo exchange in return. And now I totally understand. When someone charges a small fee just to cover like materials or florals and nobody’s walking away with any kind of profit, that’s a very different situation, and I think that kind of transparency is key if that’s how you’re doing it, sharing with your attendees what the money is going towards.
[00:13:56] But if photographers are being charged to attend and someone is [00:14:00] profiting, then I. Feel like the people that are help bringing it to life, they deserve a little something too, even if it’s discounted. You know, just to cover their materials that they’ve used. Mm-hmm. And have them donate their time in exchange for the images.
[00:14:12] And I always hear people say, well, that’s the standard practice in STA shoots, but to me it shouldn’t be. And just ’cause something in the standard doesn’t always mean it’s right. And that’s why I also started hosting them myself. I was turned off by shoots that felt disorganized. It didn’t match the advertisements, the weird energy that came with it sometimes, and I felt excluded instead of being inspired.
[00:14:34] And in some cases, only one person seemed to be profiting or benefiting the whole thing. So I wanted to give photographers a chance to have a creative content for. Their portfolio in a space where everyone feels valued. And it’s really just about the mutual respect for the work we all put into making a shoot happen.
[00:14:51] And I feel like we can’t be upset as photographers when clients don’t value our craft when you do things like that to your fellow creative. So we [00:15:00] all bring something to the table and I feel like we all deserve to eat.
[00:15:03] Lisa: Yes. I love that. God, I’m loving this conversation. Yes. Preach and. Like if you’re having a workshop and you’re, you know, you’re charging what, 1500, $2,000 for these people to come in and you’re not paying like, that doesn’t make any sense.
[00:15:21] Melissa: Yeah. And it’s sad because I’ve made a lot of vendor friends and like you hear the other side of it and it’s just so unbalanced, you know? And then they’re, it’s costing them to contribute a hundred percent. I’m just like, we, like, we don’t wanna like Yeah, there’s an exchange.
[00:15:35] Lisa: Yeah, exactly. Be fair. Be kind.
[00:15:38] I love that. So do you feel like being a multi-passionate person has helped or challenged you with your identity as a photographer?
[00:15:47] Melissa: Both. I think having different creative outlets and perspectives keeps things fresh and gives me more to pull from my background in architecture. For example, things like floral design, [00:16:00] storytelling, how I approach a session.
[00:16:01] I’d be lying if I said if it was always easy, but like I’ve said, sometimes it feels like the creative world wants you to pick a lane and stay in it, and there was definitely times I wondered if I was less serious because. I didn’t do it full time, but over time I realized all these passions feed each other and they make my work richer, more layered, more uniquely mine.
[00:16:21] So now I see it as a strength because nobody else in the world is gonna be exactly like you, and that’s your superpower.
[00:16:27] Lisa: I love it. It says, don’t pick a lane. Build your own damn highway. Oh, that should be a shirt. I love it. You hear? I heard it here first. Right?
[00:16:41] I love it. We’re making shirts.
[00:16:47] I love it. So when it comes to your creative process, what does it look like from when you have an echo idea, when your ideation to execution, when you’re planning a personal shoot.
[00:16:58] Melissa: It usually starts [00:17:00] with some type of feeling or inspiration, usually from a film or book or even something personal in my relationship with my husband.
[00:17:06] And I’ll get an idea that lingers and I start building around it. So sometimes I’ll see something on Pinterest or get inspired by another photographer, and I’ll figure out how I can make it my own. And if it’s a bigger production of an idea, I’ll literally create a mood board to visualize it better. And this helps me define like the color palette and the overall aesthetic I want to achieve.
[00:17:25] And then location scouting is next. So I’ll look at my location directory I’ve made for myself, and I’ll see if anything fits. And if not, I get to walk in and if I see something, I’ll make a note of it. And when it comes to styling, I consider every detail, wardrobe, props, ensure they align with the narrative.
[00:17:42] Hmm. If the idea is floral, I’ll think about pallets and the types of flowers I wanna have. And on the day of the shoot, I focus on that relaxed, focused approach with my clients. And we have fun and post shoot, my editing process is intuitive. I don’t. Edit two shoots the same. I let the images guide me aiming to enhance the mood [00:18:00] and emotion captured during the session.
[00:18:01] I call, I do my tweaks in Lightroom, sometimes Photoshop, and I like to give sneaks within four, eight hours just to give my client some time to hold them over. Mm-hmm. And then I send over my gallery in a few weeks after.
[00:18:12] Lisa: I love that. That’s very similar to how I do mine. And I think I like, I love I show them the back of the camera.
[00:18:18] I never keep that really secret. Yeah. We’re doing this together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Like I always, I, that’s how I like to be too. And like a lot of the time I have lots of little kids that will crawl on my lap and we’ll go through the pictures together and I What one do you like? Right. So it’s fun. I love that.
[00:18:34] Oh yeah. Have you done a notebook, like the notebook themed session before?
[00:18:40] Melissa: Yes, I’ve done it at like once you’ve done it once, couples want it. Yeah. So I’ve done it a few times, which I can imagine, which I never say no. I always love them. Yeah, I love them every single time. What would
[00:18:51] Lisa: be your dream
[00:18:52] Melissa: session?
[00:18:53] Oh my goodness, man. I think I wanna be in like an actual castle in like Scotland or something. [00:19:00] Yes. Something I don’t get a lot of in Florida for sure.
[00:19:04] Lisa: Where is a photographer in Scotland and for the life of me, I can’t remember her name, but she has something called the main character club. And so it’s basically you come to Scotland and she takes you on the shoot and like you become the main character in.
[00:19:19] This sort of historical romancey kind of experience and I’m like, oh my god, my heart
[00:19:25] Melissa: that is like, yes. Oh my god. That’s brilliant. Yeah. I love when photographers make their session like an experience. Right? Yeah. Love it.
[00:19:34] Lisa: Alright girl. You ready for our lightning round?
[00:19:36] Melissa: Yes.
[00:19:38] Lisa: Okay. Coffee or tea and how do you take it?
[00:19:41] Coffee, ice. With caramel and oat milk. Go to comfort Show or movie?
[00:19:47] Melissa: The office.
[00:19:49] Lisa: Oh, that’s a good one. One app you couldn’t live without.
[00:19:52] Melissa: Canva.
[00:19:53] Lisa: Oh yeah, good one. What’s something you’ve learned about yourself this year? [00:20:00]
[00:20:00] Melissa: That rest is productive for me. Yep, a hundred percent. Morning person or night owl? Morning, surprisingly.
[00:20:08] Ah, I am not. I’m up at 5:00 AM every day, no matter what time I sleep. It’s like my internal clock.
[00:20:16] Lisa: Yeah. Wow. I wish, no, I like struggle to get outta bed. I’m just like,
[00:20:20] Melissa: Hmm.
[00:20:20] Lisa: And I set my alarm for like six because I’ll just hit the EW button for like every 10 minutes for an hour. That’s my husband. Right. If you could instantly master one new skill, what would it be?
[00:20:34] Photography wise, video in general. Sign language. Nice. That’d be a good one. What’s one simple joy that always makes you smile?
[00:20:44] Melissa: My dogs.
[00:20:46] Lisa: What’s your favorite way to romanticize An ordinary day.
[00:20:50] Melissa: Just noticing the little things. Hmm.
[00:20:53] Lisa: Now you’re gonna be coming to teach for the Milky Way, so can you share a little bit what you’re teaching?
[00:20:59] Melissa: Yeah, I’m [00:21:00] gonna teach my little approach to how I do my storytelling couple sessions and my whole approach to that, so I’m so excited to share that.
[00:21:10] Lisa: We’re so excited to have you now, I’d love to end my interviews just with this last question, and it is, what are you currently curious about or artistically curious about?
[00:21:21] Melissa: I’m really curious about video. I feel like that’s the next thing that can uplevel my. Photography. And I feel like, because my whole goal is try to make it feel like your session is a little movie. Mm-hmm. So I feel like having video can be like your trailer.
[00:21:39] Lisa: Yes. Oh my God. I love trailers so much.
[00:21:42] Melissa: Me too.
[00:21:42] Lisa: Had I known like. Being doing, like being in movies or do like working on movies was an option for me. I probably would’ve done that, but I didn’t, and I’m
[00:21:50] Melissa: here,
[00:21:52] Lisa: which is great. I love trailers too.
[00:21:54] Melissa: I love them. If I could go to the theater and just watch trailers, I would,
[00:21:58] Lisa: yes. My [00:22:00] husband is the opposite. He gets so mad when they show like the whole mo movie over three minutes and he’s just like, oh, now we, now we can’t.
[00:22:06] Now we can’t see it. I’m like, what do you mean now it sounds like I wanna see it. That’s awesome. I was like, that’s a great thrill. Love the music. Yeah. So funny. We’re so different. Yeah, they love, that’s what makes it fun. Right, exactly. Melissa, thank you so much for hanging out with me today. It’s been a pleasure chatting with you.
[00:22:27] Melissa: Thank you so much for having me.
[00:22:29] Lisa: Oh my. Beautiful friends. I hope you have loved this conversation just as much as I have. I am sending you so much of my light and my love today and every single day. We’ll see you next
[00:22:41] time.
