Failure comes for us all eventually, especially as creatives. Sometimes we try something new and exciting… and it just does not work. It can sting, it’s certainly a blow to the ego, and it can often leave us confused about where to go next.

But, in my experience, a failure is often an opportunity in disguise. It’s data that can help you reevaluate and move forward more successfully. So in this episode, we’re going to walk through how we can embrace failure and use these difficult experiences to build back even stronger.

What’s in this episode:

• [00:26] The big F-word that all creatives experience
• [02:05] The breakthroughs that can come after failure
• [04:55] Some of the lessons that failure can teach us
• [06:45] How we can reframe failure and use it to keep us moving forward
• [09:31] What to do immediately after a failure

Tune in to this episode for a little kick in the pants to reframe that failure into something beneficial to your creative business!

SUBSCRIBE: Apple Podcasts | Spotify

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Did this episode help you rethink the way you view failure? Check out this episode Cultivating An Attitude Of Adaptability with Heidi Hope

Transcript

[00:00:00] Speaker: Hey friend, welcome to the Art and Soul Show. I’m your host, Lisa DiGeso, a mom, a photographer, and entrepreneur. Tune in here for pep talks, conversations, and advice on photography, creativity, mindset, business, life, and that messy in between. This is the place where you can go when you need a boost of encouragement, a kick in the pants, and inspiration to pick up your camera.

[00:00:24] This is the Art and Soul Show. Hello, my beautiful friends, and welcome back to the show. So today we’re talking about a topic that I think we’ve all had some experience with, and that is a big F word. Failure. Maybe we’ve all been there. Marketing campaigns that get crickets. Social media posts that get no likes.

[00:00:46] And maybe clients that just inquire and ghost. Cards that go corrupt before backing them up. Maybe clients that you forgot to confirm or even write down their appointment. And then they show up and you answer the door in a bathrobe and a towel [00:01:00] on your head, thinking it’s the FedEx guy. Or maybe that last one was just me.

[00:01:05] But we all have to face these moments sometimes, and I know failure can really feel scary. It can feel overwhelming. It can feel humiliating. It can either set you down the path of a shame spiral, or you can stand up and dust yourself off from it and look at it as also one of the best teachers we have.

[00:01:26] If you’re willing to learn from it now, I want to share some thoughts on what it really means to fail forward, because let’s face it. Failure is not something that we really talk about enough, especially in creative industries like photography everywhere. You look, it’s a perfectly curated Instagram feed.

[00:01:43] It could be highlight reels just of success and these beautiful images and stories of people crushing it and getting all the clients. But what we don’t see is the mess. The truth of all of those failure stings, whether it’s a launch that didn’t go as planned, or [00:02:00] maybe a client that wasn’t happy, or maybe just a session that completely bombed.

[00:02:05] It feels personal. It feels like proof that we’re the one that’s not good enough and that we’re not cut out for this. But here’s the thing is failure is not a dead end. It’s just a little roadblock and you need to find an alternate route. So I’ll let you in on a little secret. Some of my biggest breakthroughs come right after my biggest bombs, my biggest failures.

[00:02:26] And I’m not saying this because it sounds good. I’m saying it because it’s true. Now I’ll never forget one of my very first failures as a photographer, It was my first newborn session, actually. I was so excited. I was starting out. I was reading everything I could about newborn photography. And in fact, this was my very first newborn session.

[00:02:45] I got to my client’s home and the dog was barking. The toddler was crying and I lugged my ginormous beanbag in. My friend slash client very enthusiastically handed me her screaming newborn. She was just really excited about the break she was [00:03:00] going to finally get, and I blanked. The room was freezing, the baby was wide awake, and did I mention the baby was also 8 weeks old?

[00:03:10] Covered in acne, and the dad was sleeping and snoring on the couch, and he had a sports game on, and it was just blaring. The day was also super dark and super overcast. It was in the middle of a Canadian winter, and I was just trying to figure out how to calm this crying baby, learn to wrap it so she couldn’t kick out of it, and just get her to sleep.

[00:03:29] And I just felt like such I was a loser during that session, you guys, I felt like I was never going to get it. I just felt so embarrassed. And I walked away from that session just with some really grainy photos. I felt like a failure. I went home and I bawled my eyes out. And I really questioned my decision to pursue photography.

[00:03:52] But after I got over that little pity party, and to be completely honest, a lot of wine, I started to really ask myself some really hard [00:04:00] questions. It was like, what went wrong? Was I creating this for myself? What could I do differently next time? Like that experience, it taught me so much. I made a list of things that I was never going to do again.

[00:04:16] I made the decision from that day forward. I was never going to be an in home photographer and that my clients would always come to my environment and one that I can create. I learned that the age a baby was was really important and the temperature of the room was really important. I learned eventually how to wrap and how to sue the baby.

[00:04:37] Countless lessons just from that one failure. And it is still so crystal clear in my mind. And it was 15 years ago, but also not just about photography. I learned a lot about myself. It reminded me that failure. Isn’t about the outcome. It’s a lot about to do with the lessons that we need to learn during it.

[00:04:55] And let’s talk about lessons because failure really has a way of teaching us things [00:05:00] we’d never learn. Otherwise, sometimes it might be a technical lesson, like maybe. Your camera somehow got switched to manual and you can’t figure out why your lens won’t focus. It could be maybe buying 20 blankets in colors you don’t even like.

[00:05:16] And that just is detrimental to your finances of your business. Other times it could be, you know, chronically undercharging or over delivering sometimes it’s deeper lessons about resilience or patience or trust. And one thing that I’ve really noticed is that failure often shines a spotlight on the stories we’re telling ourselves.

[00:05:36] You know, that little voice that’s maybe inside your head, that one that loves to chime in when things go wrong, that one that chips away at your self esteem and tells you you are just stupid for trying. Does it sound familiar? Because that is the voice that I have too. That’s the inner mean girl. And let me tell you, she is relentless.

[00:05:55] She thrives on self doubt and loves to keep us [00:06:00] small. But the truth is, that voice is not your truth, it’s just fear in disguise and your brain trying to keep you safe. When my inner Mean Girl gets loud, I try to ask myself, is this helping? Answer almost always is no. Instead, I try to sort of channel my inner cheerleader, the one who says, okay, you know what, this did not work out, but you’re not done yet.

[00:06:22] Get up. What’s next? And let’s not forget, failure just doesn’t always have to be this big dramatic thing. Sometimes it’s those little moments, like when I post a reel that I think is hilarious, and it completely flops. And those moments might feel embarrassing, but they’re also opportunities sort of to laugh at ourselves, to learn, to move on.

[00:06:45] One of the best ways to reframe failure really is to just think of it as data. It’s not the most glamorous word, but hear me out. Every time you try something and it doesn’t work, you are collecting valuable information. Maybe it’s about what your audience wants. [00:07:00] Maybe it’s about what lights you up creatively.

[00:07:03] Maybe it’s about how you recover from a total face plant with a little more grace for yourself. And can we talk about maybe perfectionism for a second? Because I think a lot of us, especially creatives, we fall into this trap of thinking that everything has to be perfect, that everyone around us is perfect.

[00:07:22] Perfection is a myth. It’s a moving target. It keeps us stuck in this cycle of fear and procrastination. So if you’re waiting for that perfect moment, or you’re waiting for that perfect idea or the perfect version of yourself to take action, you’re going to be waiting forever. Instead, you need to give yourself permission to show up messy, imperfect, and human.

[00:07:45] Because that is where the magic actually happens. Now I want to share another story with you. I launched a new course a few years ago and I poured my heart into it. I stayed up way too late working on it. I was convinced it was going to be huge. But when we [00:08:00] launched it, the response was, let’s just say it was underwhelming.

[00:08:03] Okay, it was pretty much crickets, but sometimes that’s how it goes. I, I was feeling devastated. I started questioning whether I was cut out to be an educator, whether I even had something valuable to offer. But after a good cry and some honest reflection, I realized something. I hadn’t really listened to my audience.

[00:08:23] I had created something that I thought they needed without actually asking them what they wanted. So when we went back to the drawing board, we sent out surveys, we had conversations and we listened. And guess what? The next launch was awesome. Not because it was perfect, but because it was aligned. So that experience really reminded me that failure isn’t a sign that we’re not good enough.

[00:08:44] It’s a sign that we’re just learning and we’re growing and we’re figuring things out. And let’s be real. Some of the most successful people in the world failed huge before they succeeded. Think about J. K. Rowling, who was rejected by [00:09:00] 12 publishers before someone took a chance on Harry Potter. Or Oprah, who was told she wasn’t even fit for television.

[00:09:07] If they had let failure define them, we wouldn’t have stories and inspiration today about them. So, my friend, what about you? What’s a failure that’s been holding you back? Maybe it’s time to just take another little look at it. Not as defeat, but sort of as a stepping stone. Now, before we wrap up, I really want to leave you with a few things to think about.

[00:09:31] First, give yourself grace. Failure doesn’t mean you’re not good enough, it just means you’re human. Second, get really curious instead of just beating yourself up and ask yourself, what can I learn from this? And finally my friend, keep going because failure is a chance to grow and every step forward brings you closer where you’re meant to be.

[00:09:58] Alright, my friends, that’s all for [00:10:00] today. Thank you for sharing this space for me, for listening, and for being willing to embrace the messiness of growth. Remember, you’re not alone in this, we’re all just figuring everything out as we go. I am sending you so much of my light and my love today and every single day.

[00:10:18] We’ll see you next time.