We’ve all felt that pang—a new photographer that’s blowing up right in our home town, a beautiful session at a location you’re just dying to shoot, or maybe something small like seeing more comments or compliments on another creative’s work instead of yours.
This jealousy doesn’t often feel good, bringing shame, guilt, and resentment if we don’t address the root causes. But jealousy doesn’t mean that we’re bad or heartless. It’s an opportunity for us to grow and learn more about ourselves.
In this episode, I’m sharing why we all experience this jealousy at some point in our photography careers, how to harness our jealousy into something useful instead of harmful, and my own personal story of jealousy. We don’t have to let it take over our lives, friends.
What’s in this episode:
- [00:30] Why everyone—photographers included—experience jealousy sometimes
- [01:42] The quote that shifted my perspective on jealousy
- [03:18] How we can harness jealousy as a tool to grow instead of letting it turn into resentment
- [04:49] How getting curious can help us pinpoint what’s underneath jealousy
- [05:15] A personal story of navigating my own jealousy
Tune in to this episode for how to navigate these sticky, jealous feelings that come with comparison and creativity!
SUBSCRIBE: Apple Podcasts | Spotify
Did this episode give you some good ideas for the next time creative jealousy rears its ugly head? Check out this episode Regroup & Reset: My 3-Step Process to get you Back on Track After a Setback in your Photography Business with Lisa DiGeso
Transcript
[00:00:00] Hey, friend. Welcome to the Art and Soul Show. I’m your host, Lisa DiGeso, a mom, a photographer and entrepreneur. Tune in here for Pep Talks, conversations and advice on photography, creativity, mindset, business, life, and that messy in between. This is the place where you can go when you need a boost of encouragement, a kick in the pants, and inspiration to pick up your camera.
[00:00:24] This is the Art and Soul show. Hello my friend. Welcome back to the Art and Soul Show. So today we’re diving into a topic that’s honestly maybe a little uncomfortable, but it is incredibly important, and that is creative jealousy. First, let’s just normalize this right off the bat because jealousy is something every creative, every photographer, every artist feels at some point.
[00:00:52] And you probably know this feeling. Maybe you’ve been scrolling social media and you see another photographer booking sessions [00:01:00] at a location you’ve dreamed about, or maybe someone’s work is featured in a magazine and you’ve always admired them and wished that you could have that. And suddenly you just have this sharp ping in your stomach or maybe their reels go viral and yours just flop my friend.
[00:01:17] I have felt it too. And sometimes subtle, just a quick little sting. And sometimes it’s a big, bold and impossible feeling. I can’t ignore. And honestly, sometimes it just feels shameful to admit it out loud, right? We’re supposed to champion community over a competition, and truly, we genuinely want to celebrate others’ wins, but then those jealous healings kind of start to creep in.
[00:01:42] Here’s something that shifted things for me recently. Mel Robbins, who you probably know from her motivational books and talks, she says, jealousy is actually just desire showing up, and I love how she puts it that way. Jealousy is desire. That’s all it is. You can’t be jealous of someone or [00:02:00] something you don’t truly desire.
[00:02:02] So when I heard this, for me, it felt more like a giant light bulb moment. It’s not about being petty or being mean-spirited. It’s your heart and your mind revealing something that you truly, truly, deeply want. Jealousy really isn’t there to shame us. It’s this flashing neon sign, this arrow pointing straight to our dreams.
[00:02:25] Now, there’s also an important distinction we need to make between envy and jealousy. So envy is when you want something, someone else has like a particular style, maybe client base, maybe opportunities and jealousy. Jealousy comes through the fear of losing something that’s important to you, like maybe your clients, maybe your reputation, or maybe even your sense of worth or value.
[00:02:51] So think about it this way, maybe a new photographer pops up in your community and they’re charging way less than you. Then suddenly everyone is booking [00:03:00] with them, and your bookings start to slow down and you start to feel anxiety. That anxiety that you’re feeling, that’s jealousy. It’s fear. It’s fear of losing your clients or your sense of security, your feelings of relevance, and it’s entirely human.
[00:03:18] You are not alone in feeling this way, but what do we do with this uncomfortable feeling and how can we stop it from it becoming resentment or bitterness? So here is the magic part my friend. Jealousy and envy become powerful tools when you acknowledge them. When you have that feeling pop up, I want you to pause and I want you to ask yourself, what is this jealousy telling me that I truly desire?
[00:03:44] Maybe you realize you want more adventure in your sessions, or you wanna change up your editing style, or maybe it’s more travel opportunities, or maybe it’s even more creative freedom. But once you’ve pinpointed exactly what it is you’re desiring, you have to take the next step, [00:04:00] and that is turning it into fuel.
[00:04:02] So instead of resenting that photographer who is booking those dream sessions and all those clients, let their success show you what’s possible. They’ve become proof that your dreams are achievable. Mel Robbins also says it beautifully, whoever or whatever is making you jealous, good. Their success doesn’t shrink your chances of creating what you want.
[00:04:26] It expands it. Let them lead the way. So let’s turn jealousy into a roadmap, and here is a quick guide for you for when those feelings actually pop up. So number one, we want to name our feelings clearly. Are you feeling envy? You’re wanting something someone else has? Or are you feeling jealousy, fear of losing something that you value?
[00:04:49] Number two, ask yourself, why get curious. What’s beneath that feeling? Is it recognition? Is it financial security? I. Is it [00:05:00] creative freedom or is it something else? And number three, flip the script. Recognize that if someone else achieved something, it’s proof that you can too. Let their success inspire your next steps rather than intimidate you.
[00:05:15] So let me share something personal. So years ago when I was new to photography, I was watching others hosting incredible workshops and getting recognition and traveling and seemingly living my dream. And at first I was really deeply insecure and almost a little resentful. I. When I took a step back and I realized these feelings were simply my heart showing me exactly what I truly desired was to teach and to connect and to impact others.
[00:05:41] And from that clarity, I took action that actually aligned with my life. I focused on my own growth on growing my online presence, on my online business, using my voice, and ultimately building something that felt true and meaningful to me. So my friend, remember, jealousy doesn’t mean [00:06:00] you lack kindness or community spirit.
[00:06:03] You can deeply believe in lifting others up and still have moments where you wish it was you in their shoes. It’s okay to hold both feelings at once. Joy for their success and desire for your own. So next time jealousy visits, you welcome it as a guide and not an enemy. Let it clarify your vision, sharpen your desires, and help you move forward.
[00:06:27] My friend, you are not alone. We are all navigating this creative journey together. Thank you so much for tuning in today, and as always, I am sending you so much of my light and love. I’ll see you next time.
