We’ve all had those moments of feeling stuck in-between something. Either we’re waiting for a new stage of life or we’re on the verge of a breakthrough and what we’re doing currently just isn’t working quite right.
It can be a deeply frustrating place to find ourselves both in life and in our photography businesses. But it doesn’t have to last forever, and we can come out the other side of this messy middle stage stronger and more invigorated.
So in this episode, I’m sharing what the messy middle is for many photographers, why it can be so overwhelming when we’re in it, and some practical steps for navigating through this stage just a little bit faster.
What’s in this episode:
- [00:30] What the “messy middle” is when it comes to our businesses
- [02:29] How this messy middle causes us to question ourselves and our businesses
- [04:22] What this in-between stage actually means about our business
- [05:00] Some steps you can take to move through this messy middle stage
- [10:20] An encouragement for anyone currently navigating this stage
Tune in to this episode for how to navigate being in the messy middle of your photography business!
SUBSCRIBE: Apple Podcasts | Spotify
Did this episode give you encouragement to keep going when you feel stuck in the “in-between” when it comes to your creative business? Check out this episode Take your shot : How to Find Your Unique Photography Voice with Valerie Eidson that shares how another photographer started their career!
Transcript
[00:00:00] Hey, friend. Welcome to the Art and Soul Show. I’m your host, Lisa DiGeso, a mom, a photographer and entrepreneur. Tune in here for Pep Talks, conversations and advice on photography, creativity, mindset, business, life, and that messy in between. This is the place where you can go when you need a boost of encouragement, a kick in the pants, and inspiration to pick up your camera.
[00:00:24] This is the Art and Soul show. Hello my friend. So today I wanna chat about something that has been coming up for me a lot lately, and it’s something that you might be feeling too, and I’m calling it the messy middle. It’s that stage when you’re no longer at the exciting beginning, maybe your business or even photography, but you’re definitely not at the finish line yet.
[00:00:48] It’s this sort of awkward phase. It’s the in between. It’s like. Puberty, and let’s be honest, it can feel really uncomfortable, messy, and frustrating. So [00:01:00] I’ve been in so many messy middles throughout my life and my career and you know those points where your work just doesn’t feel like you. Maybe it’s your editing style or how your posing clients are just something, you know, something is off, but you can’t even quite put your finger on it.
[00:01:16] And for me, it often shows up in my photography, especially when I. Really start to refine my style. It could be maybe my styling of my client closet, or it could be styling of my editing. I remember spending hours in Photoshop, just editing, and I just couldn’t get them to feel right. My colors didn’t seem right, the skin tones were off or, and you know, I still go through this and honestly, it’s almost, I can’t even articulate exactly what I don’t like, but it’s just not working sometimes.
[00:01:50] Also, sometimes in my sessions, especially with newborns, my posing felt awkward. Or even with my family sessions when clients just, they all felt really [00:02:00] stiff and awkward and forced, and I’d be just behind the camera thinking, why doesn’t this look right? What am I missing here? Is it how I’m directing them?
[00:02:08] Is it how I’m communicating these sessions? I just felt stuck or just stuck in styling where I’m communicating how I want my clients to show up. And they’re showing up in baseball hats and graphic t-shirts and you know, something’s wrong, but you can’t even really articulate what is happening and why it’s not working.
[00:02:29] So those are those messy moments and I genuinely question myself, am I even good at this? And you start thinking like, shouldn’t I have it all figured out by now? And you start judging yourself, and it’s a time where you just kind of start to feel stuck and frustrated and honestly kind of embarrassed.
[00:02:49] And I think the hardest part of the messy middle is we just rarely talk about it. That, you know, everything is a cycle. Sometimes we’re feeling like we’re on the top of the world and other times we just are [00:03:00] in the dumps. But there’s also this vast gray area of this. Uncomfortable, messy, middle. We love celebrating the exciting beginnings when we’re launching new ideas or businesses, or we’re starting new projects and we love the finishings when we get to post something and we have an amazing session, and we’re getting all that wonderful feedback.
[00:03:21] And online forums or online groups or on social media. We love to showcase our big transformations when we’re sharing our wins and achievements. But that messy middle part. That’s uncomfortable. It’s that uncertain space and it’s usually pretty invisible. And because we don’t share about it openly, we sort of assume we are the only one going through this.
[00:03:44] We think that everyone else has all of their stuff figured out. They have all the clients, they have, all the inquirers people are just knocking down their door and we are the only ones sitting here spinning our wheels, putting out promotions and getting nothing coming back. But here is the truth [00:04:00] that I’ve discovered through.
[00:04:01] Years of being stuck in various messy middles. The messy middle is exactly where our real growth happens. And think about it this way, when you are feeling that discomfort when your editing fills off, or your posing doesn’t feel like it’s aligning and your style just isn’t coming together, that’s actually a powerful moment.
[00:04:22] It’s that moment. Your taste and your skill aren’t quite matching up yet. Your vision is evolving faster than your current abilities, and that’s okay. You’re not stuck. You’re actually just growing. But growth is awkward. That’s why they have growing pains. It’s uncomfortable, and it’s certainly not linear, but knowing that doesn’t always make it easier.
[00:04:47] So what do you actually do when you find yourself in the messy middle? So even though I am still going through many, many messy middles myself, here is what I’ve learned and honestly, what I’m still learning to do in these moments, [00:05:00] number one is stop resisting the discomfort. When something feels off, our first instinct is often to push harder or judge ourselves harshly.
[00:05:11] For me, it’s when I like to start comparing my straight out of camera images to some of my favorite photographers, especially fine art photographers work. On Instagram, and that’s when I know that something is off. It’s the resistance to it that actually makes us more stuck. Instead of acknowledging where you are and also acknowledging that you’re comparing apples and oranges, allow yourself to say, you know what?
[00:05:38] I’m not loving my editing right now. I’m not feeling very confident with my posing right now. My styling is not matching what’s in my head, and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just means you’re noticing a gap between your current ability and your vision and your awareness is honestly the first step in bridging that [00:06:00] actual gap.
[00:06:00] Now a second is just getting really curious. When something doesn’t feel right, ask yourself questions to identify what exactly it is that might be off. Instead of just saying, my photos look bad, or My lighting looks bad, or my editing tones look bad. It’s looking at it and saying, okay, what exactly about my lighting isn’t working?
[00:06:21] What exactly about my posing or how I’m instructing people isn’t working? Why do my clients look stiff? Is it because I’m rushing my sessions or I’m anxious is my styling because I’m not really communicating how I would like my work to look? Do I need to model, call and do some styling sessions? Do I need to do more research on styling and learn more about it?
[00:06:45] Getting curious helps you see exactly what you need to tweak, and that clarity really becomes your roadmap outta that messy middle. Third, try something new without pressure. When we feel stuck, the best [00:07:00] way to get unstuck is often just to play. And for me, this is something that I resist so much. I put perfection on myself, and I just stop playing.
[00:07:10] But when I let go of the pressure of perfection. I try a new editing TA technique or I get new, some new, new tutorials. And for you, maybe it’s getting an online retreat. Maybe it’s some of our classes when you try something new just for fun without worrying if it’s on brand or you book a session purely just to practice posing without the expectation of producing perfect images.
[00:07:37] Messy middles can often mean you’re bored or just creatively blocked. So changing things up even just slightly can sort of reignite that spark. And honestly, sometimes for me, it may even be purchasing a new prop or a new headband. I’m not saying break the bank, I’m saying sometimes that inspiration can come from [00:08:00] getting something new too.
[00:08:02] Now fourth is leaning into community. And this is huge because the messy middle can feel very lonely. And this is why our retreats and our communities for retreats and learning together is so important to us because when that messy middle feels lonely, it feels like you’re the only one that’s going through that pain of learning.
[00:08:23] And sometimes when you’re in that middle. You’re too close to see your work or to even see it clearly. So will we really encourage our students to put their work up for critique and we have certain rules on feedback in our communities on how to guide people to be great critiquers and to accept feedback.
[00:08:45] A lot of the time, the feedback that we’re getting when we take it the right way and I will have an episode on critique, feedback can really help us move quicker through that messy stage and to get clarity faster. And this one may be obvious, [00:09:00] but it’s really important too. It’s embracing patience with yourself and compassion because the messy middle rarely clears up overnight.
[00:09:08] Maybe that’s because growth does take time. Be gentle with yourself. Remember that progress isn’t a straight line. It’s filled with ups and downs and circles, and sometimes you think you’ve moved past that messy middle stage only to find yourself back there, and that is completely normal. You’re allowed to evolve slowly and gently and imperfectly.
[00:09:31] And if you’re in that messy middle right now, hear me my friend. You are not alone. I’m always, I swear, living in the messy middle. You’re not behind, you’re not failing. You are exactly where you need to be growing in ways you might not even realize yet your awkward stage, this uncomfortable growth. It is exactly where your future clarity and your confidence and your strength come from.
[00:09:57] So it’s come almost like that awkward [00:10:00] haircut stage we’ve all been through when we cut bangs and we’re in that between where we’re not sure if we should cut them off again or grow them out. Grow them out. Something beautiful is grooving, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. So if your editing’s not quite there, or your posing is feeling uncomfortable and not right, keep practicing, keep exploring.
[00:10:20] This uncomfortable stage is not going to last forever. And trust me, one day you’re gonna look back and realize the messy middle was actually your greatest teacher. It’s where you learn to become more confident and more resilient and really more yourself. So take a deep breath, give yourself some grace.
[00:10:40] Keep showing up even when it feels uncomfortable because my friend, you have got this. Thank you so much for hanging out with me today, my friend. I am honestly so grateful you’re here, especially through all these messy middles and the ones that I share in the show. I am sending you so much of my light and my [00:11:00] love today and every single day.
[00:11:03] We’ll see you next time.
